New illegal slander show thread -Ongoing:

Dog Sausage by Mister-Seen
I’ve been writing a lot but its been in notebooks. I did send the following email a couple days ago. I will add to this post when and if I feel like it. As I’m sure I’ve already mentioned before, I’ve not been interested in doing anything even marginally creative for quite sometime now and its been getting worse. This apathy about creating anything in any way interesting has been growing, like an insidious cancer, and has progressed from drawing pictures and writing short literary pieces to even include letters and autobiographical posts online. Not sure if this is the result of decades of being beaten down mentally and spiritually by that illegal broadcast or their hoodoo hexes. It could be either or it could be both. Whatever, what’s most important is that I hang in there and survive this defamation campaign. I refuse to let evil win. These forces of darkness have been swallowing up huge swaths of society in recent years but I will do everything I can to prevent them from getting me. Fuck evil and fuck them.

Happy Satanic Birthday You Evil POS!

I’m sure you think this is your dream job. You get to slander someone all you want and ruin their life and never have to answer for any of it since you have everyone lying to protect you. The down side of the situation, for you, at least, is that only a walking pile of steaming, subhuman shit could actually, day in and day out, do that job and not hate themselves. Maybe you do hate yourself and that’s why you do such fucked up shit? I can’t figure it out, I admit that I am incapable of understanding how shameless, demented assholes such as yourself think.

Evidently my grandfather was very naive to trust you people and I’m very upset with him that he got me so intimately tangled up with criminals such as yourselves. He used very poor judgment in that particular instance.

You are not only unethical and immoral, you are genuinely evil. I used to wonder why, since you were making good money off of me, you have been trying to kill me since high school (by trying to get me to kill myself), but the answer is obviously that I’d be worth much more to you dead than alive. Lord knows you’ve never paid me a fucking cent despite the fact you’ve all grown rich off of me. And no, having the spies and whores you’ve employed to stand between me and the public buy me trinkets now and again is not a legitimate form of compensation. In fact, instead of paying me any kind of reasonable compensation for stealing my life from me you have striven to do all you could to insure I died in abject misery.
I can’t believe that, now that I know what you people have been doing to me for nearly 50 years, that you actually think you have a chance in hell of convincing me that I was crazy and imagined the whole thing. Once the genie is out of the bottle (or once the “C.A.T. is out of the bag” LOL) you should know it’s impossible to ever get it back in again. It was never fully in there to begin with. I always felt I was on television since I was in grade school, and even that things around me were always being staged for my benefit. I used to think that was kind of crazy, but what’s really crazy is that my impressions turned out to be so accurate.
Dontstopbeleivein M-750x750 by Mister-Seen
Too bad you cowardly assholes hide behind a thick curtain of deception because I’d love to hear how you justify ruining a young child’s life just to make a few bucks. You truly are scum you know. When I think back on all the trouble and misery you’ve made for me over the years with your hokey ‘candid camera’ rip off show I get very sad and angry. You have no right to do something like that to anyone, let alone a child. I can’t even say you really wrecked my life because you never even let me build one you could wreck in the first place since you’ve been weighing me down with your constant slander since I was at least nine years old.
What really gets me is despite the fact you owe me for the soft life I have unknowingly provided for you you’ve shown me no gratitude whatsoever. Beyond petty shit you have done to me, like charge me $350 a month rent to live in your basement, which, incidentally wasn’t fit for human habitation (and I had no choice but to live there as your show made it impossible to find any kind of room mate situation anywhere else), your spiteful and destructive nature drove you further and during one of your most outrageous libel campaigns you actually made me homeless. This was no mere impulse on your behalf as it was, in fact, the reason you lured me up here in the first place. You even stole my drivers license and had your retarded friend with the speech impediment hack into my cell phone and delete my contacts in preparation for what, I can only imagine, you felt would be my end.
By far the most wicked thing you did was get me involved with hard drugs, not once, but a few times. Yes, thanks to your fellow scum bags in the media I was curious about different drugs, but you know I never sought them out and this is why you brought them to me. I know it was you because the people that got me involved with them, Roger Jesness, Anne Hunt, and everyone in between, worked directly for you. I know this for several reasons, not the least of which was that I heard them and recordings they made on your show. As if that wasn’t bad enough you tried making it nearly impossible for me to get off of them. Actually it would have been absolutely impossible if I had to rely on other people. Not only in AA itself but even on the so called ‘recovery’ websites the childish assholes who watch your shitty work refused to do anything to help me. I could go on for pages about that, but fortunately, once I saw what idiots they were being I decided I didn’t need those pathetic losers so I stopped by myself. I guess if you still want to kill me I guess you’ll have to grow a spine and do it yourself because I’m certainly not going to help you.

Tv by Mister-Seen
Wednesday, November 7th, 2018

Today’s Scraps:

I’ve come up with a lot of screwy theories about when and why this TV thing happened and most of them are kind of embarrassing in retrospect. The fact is that I have no idea when, why or how it started. And although the first time I actually heard the show was in the fall of ’07, part of me knew about it all along before that but, and this is weird, its like I didn’t care about it. I’ve tried to explain that aspect of it a few times, how I always knew about it on some level but treated it like a fantasy or something, I knew about it but I was telling myself that I didn’t know about it. The fact is I don’t really understand that bizarre, contradictory thought process and it makes no sense to me. Considering there have always been Church of Satan people behind this thing I’m pretty sure that has something to do with some kind of ensorcellment. Even after I heard the show for myself and learned how thoroughly everything I did anywhere was being watched and listened to I still didn’t want to accept it and chose to live in denial most of the time. I think this tendency of mine could also be the result of some kind of spell. In fact I now think a lot of the odd things I thought and did and the compulsions I fought against were the result of them manipulating me with occult forces. For example, one of the weird things I remember doing was getting naked and decorating myself all over with different colored markers. I didn’t even take any pictures or anything. Though I didn’t know it at the time what I did was obviously done to entertain all the kinky voyeurs watching me on the broadcast CCTV feed. Other than that I can think of no other reason why I did it. Of course, frustrated by the fact every God damned thing I do is watched so closely and that there is no way I can escape from it I started saying and posting things online that I knew could upset all the stupid losers who watch that idiotic show, as well as the evil assholes who make it. That was such a flawed plan that I can’t help but think they must have influenced me to do that with their voodoo hoodoo as well. That spell seems to have quite an extraordinary hold on me since I’m having a very hard time trying to stop doing those things, but since that seems to be my only way of expressing my (very justifiable) anger over this whole fucked up situation its been very difficult. In fact, I had known I was being heavily spied upon for over five years when the idea came to me to start a blog full of things that I knew would send smoke billowing out of their pointy little ears. I deleted them all a year or two ago once I finally came to my senses and realized how dumb that was. Why did I insist on provoking these megalomaniac media monsters? Its such a one sided struggle that I’m bound to be the loser, and I’m sure that’s exactly why they singled me out in the first place. If my family had a presence and carried any kind of weight in the world those people never would have dreamed of doing a thing against me. As it is I just come from a long line of worker ants so these jerks felt perfectly safe stomping on me like they’ve been doing. Another good example of how they were manipulating me was all my substance abuse. I honestly thought I’d never stop drinking, smoking and doing drugs, yet not long after I discovered that there were a lot of very evil and powerful people who not only wanted me doing all those things, but had actually arranged things so that I was introduced to them in the first place, its like the compulsion completely left me. I really can’t explain it. Sure, I think about drugs occasionally, and even have a few drinks during the holidays sometimes, but I no longer have a desire to get carried away. If I get prescribed pain medication I use it as directed now. This would have been impossible ten years ago. This is not the result of therapy or a twelve step program, rather just my realizing what the f*ck has really been going on. I’m sure this is a big part of why they insisted everyone be evasive and lie to me about this whole thing. It’s primarily the secrecy that gave them such power over me. Thank God those people at the welfare hotel in Oakland were so fucking stupid and never thought to lower the volume on their televisions or I could possibly still be in the dark about it. Heck, I may have even been driven to kill myself by this time.

Anyway, one of the bizarre things I noticed about that show is how myopic their public is. I guess it has to do with the focus of the media, but most viewers seem to have very narrow tunnel vision. Nobody even seems to give a f*ck, assuming they ever think about it at all, that I’ve been the victim of an egregious crime since I was a very young child and that the public has been condoning it by willingly cooperating with those assholes by lying to me about it all my life. I mean, it doesn’t take much perception to see how heinous this all is. I’ve been being set up, made a fool of and secretly recorded by fucking cameras and microphones hidden in my private residence and all this being broadcast all over the fucking world for as long as I can recall. I really don’t think any of you could even possibly imagine what life has been like for me, living under a public microscope since I was a child. To further constrict my isolation and lower the probability that someone might accidentally slip up and let me know some of what’s going on, since my young adulthood at least, all my friends and girlfriends have been directly employed by these people. It’s like I’m literally thier property and they are protecting their investment. Aside from actually building an artificial world for me to inhabit like on “The Truman Show” they couldn’t have more complete control everything I do, say and experience. It’s a new and sick form of slavery, but NOBODY ever has a word to say against this. Instead all the Pavlovian imbeciles out there are always allowing themselves to get worked up about things I said, never mind the fact that I never consciously intended for the public to hear any of them and the recordings of my saying them were obtained illegally. This was until eleven years ago when I learned that everything I said was being transmitted all over the globe. I knew from listening to thier show what kind of character they’ve made of me so I decided to flesh it out for them and show them how to do it right. Am I just expressing my understandable frustration by mocking the public or am I just responding to their infernal incantations? I wish I knew but this insane situation has me pretty confused to be honest.

Also keep in mind that since they have been so closely controlling both me and my social life for nearly 50 years my media masters should share at least as much responsibility for anything I say as myself. Aside from themselves for repeatedly tuning in, logically the people the public should primarily be mad at if anything on the show upsets them are the assholes who create it and broadcast it. After all this whole thing is actually a reflection of them, it’s creators. I’m pretty sure a large part of why they make sure to always have me be as controversial as possible was to create this exact situation, where the public is so busy frothing over things I’ve said that goes against their conditioning, that no one even notices or cares about the fact that several of my most basic human rights have been being violated since I was at least nine to make their ridiculous little show. That’s really the only issue about all this that any reasonable human being has any business getting hot under the collar about.
Homeless by Mister-Seen

Given all this I came to the conclusion a long time ago that the smartest thing I could do considering I have this giant juggernaut called the “media” out to destroy me, is to just drop out of society altogether. I mean they’ve proven to me that they are hell bent on turning everything against me so it’s my safest option. Unless there is something unprecedentedly weird going on here my fortune is already made so I don’t have to go out and fight for it, in fact I’d only be putting myself seriously at risk by jumping into the fray of the world at all considering they’ve already made it clear that they won’t be satisfied with anything less than my premature death. The fact that they used to report on how I suffered from depression and made much of my past suicide attempts even while constantly sabotaging everything I’ve ever tried to do- and even did everything they could to get me mixed up with dangerous drugs- makes their homicidal intentions pretty obvious. They felt that because my mother committed suicide when I was 17 and both my parents were drug addicts that I’d be easy to get rid of simply by pulling a few strings and using some psychology. They were so confident that their show would outlive me that they don’t hold back when they slander me thinking I’ll never even have an opportunity to confront any of them with their lies. In fact, back when I was in the subsidized housing complex and could hear the show regularly and I heard a lot of the outrageous lies they were telling about me they were so off the mark that most of the time I thought they were talking about somebody else. I’d be listening, thinking, “Geez, what a sick fuck!…WAITAMINNIT! They’re talking about ME!!”. Many of their stories didn’t sound anything like something I would even consider doing.

But no, as usual the public is only focused on their programmed responses to what I myself have been programmed to say. These media assholes are playing everybody like a harp from f*cking hell and it’s just business as usual for them.

What really gets me is that the media has been victimizing me all my life, exploiting me, raping my privacy, insulting and humiliating me on the air since I was a child on that criminal show and all the public can think to do about it is compound my pain and suffering by heaping even yet more abuses on me. People are not content to merely ostracize me, they do any chickenshit little thing in their power to fuck with me on top of that. Short change me when I go shopping, refuse to sell to me when I try to purchase items online, report every little thing I post on the internet, kick me out of online groups for no reason, try to get me in trouble at work, try to get me evicted from my home… anyway, you name it and these zombie f*cks have either done, or tried to do it to me, and they have been treating me like this since high school. Nice job confirming my already low opinion of you guys! Sometimes I hate humanity with a purple passion. I frequently fantasize about getting my money and building a house out in the middle of the woods, a shack out in the middle of the desert or even buying an island out in the middle of the ocean to live on. A perfect ending to that fantasy would be civilization incinerating in a nuclear flash right after I did that.

So, for all the above reasons I think the wisest thing I can do is turn my back on the world. This is a pretty sh*tty deal I’ve been given and nobody even asked me to agree to it. As I’ve said before, these assholes should have just left me the fuck alone to live my own life. Fucking up everything I’ve ever tried to do while promising to give me a lot of money once I’m old and my best years are all behind me is an unbelievably crappy deal and I’d never have agreed to it. I’ve always been creative and I’m reasonably intelligent so I’d doubtlessly have done pretty well for myself. Sh*t, I’d probably have had lots of grandchildren by now. But no, these people saw an opportunity to not only make serious money for themselves but use me for propaganda purposes, so, of course, what I wanted and what was good for me never even intruded on their nefarious plans.
Spying by Mister-Seen

One thing I worry about is that they never even had any intention of paying me at all and that’s why they wanted me dead. Anyway, even if that is true I still think that the smartest thing for me to do, considering my situation, is to stay out of trouble and leave the house as little as possible. It’s a sad life but it’s better than always being caught up in chaos and controversy. I especially need to avoid women. They already thrive on unnecessary drama to begin with but making matters worse is the fact that f*cking show encourages them to go nuts and start serious sh*t with me at every available opportunity so they can go on television and exaggerate everything, making me out to be the bad guy and vilifying me as much as possible, thereby inflaming the public against me even more than they already are. No thanks, I don’t need any more of that.

These people are Satanists, and Satan is the god of this world. There are two types of people in this wicked world, predator and prey. Although I’ve striven to disentangle myself as much as possible from worldly affairs they still see me as prey and are still coming after me. I have, per force, adopted a more philosophical and spiritual outlook on life. I’ve no choice but to drop out of the game since they’ve been stacking everything against me nearly all my life, and on top of that I was born into a train wreck to begin with. Since I am not a masochist I see no point in tasseling with the status quo. I have no resources or friends to help me anyway and lawyers won’t even talk to me. Even what few relatives I have left began acting extra strangely towards me once I figured all this out, especially my sister. I guess she was counting on getting all the money that should have gone to me once I self-destructed. Once I found out what was going on and started getting myself back together I suppose she saw her potential millions sprout wings and fly away out the window and hated me for it.
5d4937bb5ec51bd47e62d7d697aaf325411fa6ca2a10c467cf by Mister-Seen
These Satanists, by burying themselves in the toxic quagmire of this sphere, are only condemning themselves to hundreds, if not thousands of additional years of mortal suffering. They may never be able to move beyond increasingly more miserable incarnations. They perpetually lust after power and all the tainted pleasures of this world. They have made themselves into earthbound monsters. Even if I should be fortunate enough to live long enough to find myself fairly compensated for my years of suffering I needn’t contemplate scheming any kind of worldly revenge on any of them since they are harming themselves worse than I ever could. Besides, living well is indeed the best revenge possible. If I am financially compensated for all the pain and suffering they’ve caused me I can enjoy the money all the more knowing that I didn’t have to hurt anyone to get it. The only person who was hurt was myself and that’s okay since I can take it. Once this is all over I’ll have all the tapes watched as I’m very curious about a lot of things. For instance, based on things I’ve heard people say over the years I suspect they’ve had cameras in my bedroom since I was pretty young. If they did that’s pretty rank, but I’d like to see the old footage of me drawing at my desk during my teens after I dropped acid and my work really started to take off. Also I used to make tape recordings that I lost a long time ago. If they broadcast those I’d like to hear them again. Also I’ll be very interested in hearing all the lies and inappropriate things that people have been saying about me through the years and who said them. It’s good to know who your friends and enemies really are.
Seriously though, what demented asshole thought this would be good idea for a “reality” show anyway? There’s no way something like this won’t be abused by the maladjusted, power hungry losers making it. You simply can’t do a show like this about a person while they are trying to make their way in the world and it not impact them negatively. This fact is so obvious that the only conclusion we can come to is that the whole purpose of this production was always to f*ck me up. It gives these sociopaths what they live for, the ability to play god over someone and have absolute power over them. It’s not even got anything to do with thier imposing there “morality” on me or the viewers considering one of their favorite things to do is set me up behind the scenes to intentionally show me in a bad light and trip me up as much as possible. This whole perfidious production is nothing more than these creeps living out their sadistic fantasy of having the literal power of life and death over some random, unassuming schmuck. It’s all rather childish and quite silly. I can understand why these sick fucks would be so eager to work on a project like this, but I just can’t understand why they have been allowed to carry out this decidedly unhealthy project for nearly half a century and not a soul speak out against it. Again, I’m sure that has a lot to do with their obsession to portray me as unfavorably as possible, but even then I’m surprised that no one out there has the sophistication to subtract emotion from the equation and see that the whole concept behind this show is morally wrong.
10402983 10201404958443675 8096230543382655377 N by Mister-Seen
I confess that I almost feel hatred towards not only the arrogant curs who have been making this perverse show but the feeble minded fools who watch it. I’d never watch a show like that. Maybe if I was strongly urged to I may sit through 15 minutes of it just to get a taste of it, but the truth is it’s a tacky production made by trashy people and I’d feel dirty if I watched any more of it. Naturally I have such contempt for those people that I have enjoyed mocking their manufactured, pre-packaged ideals. Any thing that a fool holds as precious is bound to be nothing but rubbish anyway.

People may say that a smarter way to handle this violation would be to try to make it work for me, to just do what legitimate celebrities do and work to ingratiate myself into the public’s good graces. Keep in mind that I already know from experience that would be impossible to do in my case. Official show business personalities have teams of professional people working for them advising them of what to do and say and they put stories in the media to build them up in the eyes of the public to maintain, and, if possible, increase their popularity. I don’t have anything like that, in fact I have the exact opposite of that. These clowns have been setting me up, denouncing and condemning me as thoroughly as they could since the eighties.

My thoughts are that if the public is incapable of thinking for themselves its silly of me to give a damn what they think of me. It would be a complete waste of time for me trying to win over the public. What I’d need to do if I wanted people to get off my back is appeal to the people actually putting that show together, but considering what rotten people they are I would find that a very distasteful task. Besides, they’ve already made it perfectly clear they want me dead. They’ve been doing everything in their power for nearly forty years to achieve that so it would be a waste of time trying to make friends with them at this point. They started this whole thing. They were the ones who declared war on a nine year old child and have been making his life hell ever since. Evidently the public isn’t bright enough to know that these people are in the propaganda business and that they have a million tricks to get them to think anything they want about anything.

These TV people are taking advantage of how vulnerable I am these days to use all their power and money to try and destroy me. They never wanted me to live long enough to get the money I’ve been promised,they’ve always used some gimmick to stir the public up against e and create a toxic environment for me. They have always been petty, jealous little people. Yes, things are pretty bad for me now but my job is actually pretty simple. All I have to do is survive. I only wish I knew how much longer I’ll have to wait until this is over and I’m finally safe from these deranged reprobates.

Out of my head:

Invisible Force Field:

A68d5dd32d13524a028f48129323630d0e20ae25c65d7d77d7 by Mister-Seen

I hope I’ve not mentioned this already, but while boxing up some of my stuff I came across an old drawing I forgot I even made. It’s just a cartoon actually, and I mean “cartoon” in the original sense, “a preparatory drawing for a piece of art”. Sometimes I’ll work out the drawing in a sketchbook or on a cheap piece of paper before transferring it to a more expensive piece of paper because sometimes the nice paper can’t handle too much erasure. It’s a picture of Jesus casting out demons and sending them into a herd of swine, but, unfortunately I have no idea when I drew it, it could be anywhere from twelve to twenty three years old. I’ll scan and upload it as soon as I set up my scanner, hopefully before the end of this month.
Friday, June 1st: Damn, I’ve been cleaning all day and its still a dump in here. This is terrible. After 6 I’ll make a couple of trips out to the space, but then I’ll be really tired and I’ll still have a ton of work to do!
Tuesday, June 5th: I’ve been working so hard for the past few days trying to make up for years of neglect that I think I’ll take part of the day off today.

I’ve not been sleeping well lately. Night before last I only got five hours sleep and last night I popped open wide awake after only four hours so I don’t have very much energy today.

Must be the stress of having to deal with all this. Besides, people are coming by too today. Though it’s kind of embarrassing that I’ve not finished yet I need to remind myself that its a damned better sight than it was. Actually it’s not really even as bad as I’m making it sound, it’s just kind of nasty in the corners and behind the furniture and stuff. Anyway, when I finish that I need more boxes for the knick knacks and drawer contents. Then I need to take care of the dining room and the closet by the window. Oh, and the hallway closet too. It’s all coming along even though today is a total bust.

I just found a packet of ginseng tablets so I’m feeling better!
Packing with a deadline is funny. You know how you start up packing with economy of space in mind but by the end your basically just tossing miscellaneous stuff in boxes just to get it out of sight.
Ba73fb262b40cf84ad7fd1cbb95817cd0c2886522f4d0fcb1b by Mister-Seen
Dana would LOVE me out on the street, she’s been repeatedly trying to do that to me for the past 25 years. The only time she accomplished that was when she managed to get me into her home, then waited a while and kicked me out for no reason. I don’t know what reason she may have given the public, but she only gave me a very vague excuse having to do with some kind of renovations. Near as I know she never did anything like that.

If I was living on the street with no door to lock in front of me or roof over my head I’d be very vulnerable, especially since at last I’d not be on camera 24 hours a day. It would be a simple matter to get rid of me once and for all then. The only flaw in Dana’s plan last time was that I still had my car. That’s why she wanted it taken away. Before the theft of my driver’s license she was instrumental in getting it towed on a flimsy pretext through her connections in the OPD. Fortunately I was able to get it back.

Another lie she told me to hurry me out of there was she had only been charging me rent in order to save it for me “because she knows how bad I am with money”, and that if I got back in touch with her after a couple of days she would give it all to me. This would have amounted to many thousands of dollars. Of course I was thinking this would be too good to be true and I knew she was lying again, but I was in no position to argue. I know I could have got the cops involved because I had mail in my name and she didn’t give me a 30 day notice to vacate, but the most time I could have bought for myself was 30 days from that date. I also may have been able to get her into serious trouble for renting out a room that was unfit for human habitation, but if you don’t think she wouldn’t have made that thirty additional days a misery to me and kicked up her media slander to white hot levels you’re very naive. Naturally when I later inquired after this money she only laughed at me.

You know, that Dana Brownfield is a real piece of work. She’s been making a damned fortune off of me for over two decades, but after she used her show to spook me into her basement in Oakland she charged me $350 a month rent (it had no heat or bathroom facilities) and made me do her yard work and take care of her cats and all that, and all along my even being there at all was just the penultimate step of her plan to make me homeless. I guess I need to keep in mind that people like her think the rest of us only exist for them to exploit as they wish. What a twisted bitch. She’s made a huge pile of money off of me and now wants to get rid of me because she’s through with me and my continued survival could potentially prove to be a liability to her after all the fucked up stuff she’s done to me over the years. They have been pretty generous with some of the people they’ve hired to fuck me up. Two examples off the top of my head: Anne Hunt bought a car and took a lot of trips, two to Europe, even though she only had a part time teacher’s aid job, and Lisa Brennan, despite living off Social Security, was buying a house in Oakland. Me, I’ve never gotten anything but trouble and misery from Dana and these people despite my being the star of their show and their cash cow since I was less than ten years old. I think their endgame is pretty obvious here.

Their keeping me poor by constantly slandering me not only made it easier for them to control me, it also made me much easier for them to get rid of once they decided they were through with me. Plus their successfully isolating me has made it much less likely anyone would bother to look too deeply into my premature demise or sue them in civil court over it, or anything else associated with all this once I’ve gone. These people are more evil than Satan himself. And don’t be fooled by her working in the ‘non-profit sector’, that’s the biggest scam ever. UNICEF, for instance, who has fund drives a few times every year in public schools where they guilt all the kids into handing over their lunch money does raise a fortune by such means, but only 3 cents out of every dollar actually gets anywhere near the purported beneficiaries. The rest goes towards paying all the heavily padded salaries of the people running that organization. You can bet that all the “”charities” Dana has worked for aren’t much better. The whole business is a massive scam.
Its+a+gondola+a+mutation+of+spurdo+ 96b8dcfdd6356f by Mister-Seen
I’m doing my best to prove the flaws in their arrogant ideas. Just because they create a false world for people to mentally inhabit with their media and fill it with destructive ideas, people can choose to ignore that poison and go by real world observation and common sense instead. Their dangerous “ideals” permeate everything they film, print or record. I do, on occasion, watch old TV shows, see movies and read comics, but I know that those things represent false worlds. No one in their right mind would allow themselves to be seriously influenced by them. Also, I can understand why they thought that making someone’s life transparent would force them to conform and comply with the common mind (which they control with their media monopoly) but I think I’ve proven that it is very possible to speak and act independently despite all that. When I speak of making someone’s life “transparent” I’m only, of course, speaking about being able to see and hear everything they do or say since there’s no way as of yet to actually look into a person’s mind, but don’t worry, as I’ve said before, they’re working on that even as we speak. Anyway, I plan on surviving this horrible situation they have made for me and when it is over I plan on taking steps to ensure nothing like this ever happens to anyone ever again.

Actually, for now at least, things seem to be going even better now than I expected them too on all fronts. I’m very pleased and I’m maintaining my optimism and not feeling quite so fatigued anymore.
(BTW I recently added a tiny bit more to the end of my PID essay)

I was thinking lately about other reasons why Dana may have blown her top and started harassing me so energetically over the internet recently. This last occurrence happened about the time I mailed the Cease and Desist order to her at her home. Since she spies on me online using her privileged access to my Deviantart account she was able to read it before I even sent it to her (I foolishly saved a copy of it in my “stash’ after I wrote it out) so she already knew what I was preparing before I sent it. I sent it certified, so of courser, since she knew what it was she refused to sign for it and had the carrier lie for her saying she couldn’t deliver it because the address had no receptacle for mail (that was the odd “reason” written on the envelope when it was returned to me). That’s okay, the public saw it and knew what it said so there can be no question concerning how I feel about my lifelong persecution at their hands. I think she was just enraged that I actually have her new address. I guess she thought she was hiding from me up there in Oregon. Fortunately we have a mutual acquaintance I guess she’s forgotten about so all her movements are known to me. Anyway I’m just guessing here trying to figure out her motives. I may be wrong since it’s often impossible to fathom the twisted minds of some of these media miscreants.

Just checking in:

From Deviantart:

77ac71ffa945940ae41ed36860bd1052b329e1d6e977e407e5 by Mister-Seen
As you may know I’m not too keen on cinema, but my new favorite movie is “The Man Who Laughs”, a 1927 film based on the Victor Hugo novel “The Laughing Man”, which is about a child from a royal family who is kidnapped and disfigured, forced to live his life as a sort of clown to make buffoons laugh. Don’t ask me why, but somehow the movie speaks to me. I have no idea why though.

I just did a little research on Bob Powell, the comic book artist. I think his best work was done for Harvey comics, their “horror” line especially, although he’d worked in the industry since the beginning (1938). Unfortunately he died in 1966 of pancreatic cancer, but immediately prior to that he was the editor of “Sick” magazine. I also found out that he was born one year after my maternal grandfather in 1916 and that he attended the same high school in Buffalo Now York that he did too, “East High”. That’s quite a discovery, I wonder if they actually knew each other? Well, they’re both gone now so there’s no way of knowing, but it’s interesting to think about all the same.

In other Ron related news I’m drinking apple juice from now on. I used to drink lemonade, but I noticed the very first ingredient listed on the pink lemonade is high fructose corn syrup. In fact it’s the first ingredient listed on all the juice concentrates except cranberry and apple, possibly orange too but I didn’t check that. I’ve read somewhere that drinking a lot of that high fructose stuff can impair one mentally, plus, since I almost got diabetes I should probably stay away from artificial sweeteners. (actually I just did some more research and I can’t drink anymore fruit juice AT ALL until I get checked out and the doctor gives me the green light!)

Last night I thought I lost my wallet. Talk about an anxiety attack. I had forgotten that it was in my book bag. I put it there because I didn’t wear my jacket when I went to Big Lots yesterday because the weather has been getting almost unendurably hot lately.

I just burned the fuck out of my fingers with boiling hot water this morning. Hurt like hell too, I was dancing around yelling for ten to fifteen solid seconds after it happened. They haven’t started to blister yet but damn do they hurt and I have lots of stuff to do today!
It’s now a couple hours later and they don’t hurt so bad at all. If I’d actually touched the stove or an active burner I know I’d have blisters by now. Funny, I thought boiling water burns would be worse, but I guess dry burns are worse because of more tissue damage or something.

I just came home from running errands and I see our local meth/homeless community is thriving. I think it’s funny when I see all those bums with their begging signs that end with, “God bless” or, “B safe!” because I know most of those people would slit your throat for a dollar if they knew they could get away with it.That bitch Dana Brownfield manage to render me homeless eleven years ago through an elaborate scheme that went on for a number of years. I was living out of my car for a month or two but I never panhandled. I got a stipend from the government, but living on the street is much more expensive than most people realize. You can’t prepare your own food for one thing and parking costs money, plus I had a bit of a habit. That was the only thing that kept me from losing my mind and killing myself during that ordeal.

Having psychotic, power mad rich fucks on the warpath against you trying to kill you nearly your entire life while televising it and slanting everything so you seem like the fuck up obviously makes life much more difficult than it is for people who are allowed to live normal lives unmolested. I used to sometimes tell myself they were just testing me. I did this so the whole experience wouldn’t seem quite so threatening, but, of course I was only trying to fool myself. The night before that Dana bitch kicked me out (after her broadcast made sure the entire community of the San Francisco Bay Area was hostile towards me) she had one of her asshole friends hack into my cellphone and delete all my contacts and she even snuck into my room as I was sleeping and stole my driver’s license out of my wallet hoping to get my car taken away from me so I wouldn’t even have that anymore. That sort of behavior goes far beyond mere testing deep into homicidal psychopath territory. What an evil POS. Fortunately I still had my old, expired license in my wallet and the cops could use that to see that I had updated it. I guess she feels she’s painted herself into a corner and has no choice but to kill me to save herself. She certainly doesn’t want to deal with me anymore once I’m finally independently wealthy. Well, it’s not my fault she went overboard meddling with my life making it into a living hell, I certainly shouldn’t have to die for her fucking sins- although she seems to think that I should. What an entitled bitch. She seems to be incapable of restraining herself. When she feels she has absolute power over someone she just goes nuts. She obviously has a lot of pent up anger inside her, but why? She’s privileged as fuck and always got treated with favoritism her entire life. Despite this she’s been using her position in the media to make my life needlessly difficult. Well, judgement day is fast coming and she will stop at nothing to avoid it. All I know is that I will have to survive all the snares and obstacles she’s always laying before me if I ever want her to answer for any of the fucked up shit she has done to me.

33765897 1836793319717499 7771187613473439744 N by Mister-Seen
I’ve been thinking, I know I’ve said that Dana Brownfield found a way into my computer but I just realized that all the really weird things that have happened to me online, like my posts being deleted while I was in the process of writing them, have happened on this site, Deviantart. Her lack of self control always gives her away. I think Dana must be either working or volunteering for them and is using her position to harass me.

She may be trying to shut me down so I can no longer give my side to things, but she is also very immature and prone to childlike temper tantrums so she could just be angry that I’ve yet again foiled their nefarious plans to destroy me and this is just her doing her best to try and hurt me through any and all means available to her.

You may have noticed that I’ve put all my deviations into storage except a few recent prose pieces, yet despite the fact the public can no longer see any of my work yet another piece has been pulled today. How can someone be reporting my work if the public can’t see it? This is proof that this is an inside job since only the staff at DA can see stored work. These pieces have been up at least six to eight years yet eight of them have been reported and pulled in the last few days, and often for very exaggerated or ambiguous reasons. This is textbook harassment. I’m not particularly upset about the pictures getting yanked as I have no doubt they have everything I’ve ever posted online up at their illegal website, I just don’t want to lose this soap box because I get quite a bit of traffic here.

Damned good thing I moved away from the Berkeley/San Francisco area or all those true believers would really be giving me hell right now. Dana’s tentacles reach out here too but I’d really be suffering right now if I was still in the belly of the beast.

Again, in case anything ever happens at this account you can read all my latest posts and updates at the following two locations:

Important Update:

From Deviantart:
To start off with I just want to say a few words about Karen. You may recall an earlier post where I mentioned that I felt I was visited by the spirit of Karen’s mother because I promised her that I’d help take care of Karen after she left. Why did I promise Karen’s mother I’ll take care of her? Because I feel I owe her a debt.

One of the main reasons I’d developed so many bad habits during the past 25 years was because that damned show had been systematically pruning my life of not only meaningful relationships over the years, but all forms of human contact. In that time they’d managed to totally isolate me from everyone else. Since there wasn’t anyone I cared about in my life anymore, and no one seemed to care about me, I not only developed a lot of antisocial tendencies, I wasn’t very fastidious about looking out for my health either. I think most mature people look out for themselves because they know that they affect the people around them. If you allow your health to deteriorate you become a burden to your friends and family. If you die you create emotional hardship for those who care about you, but I can’t say I was thinking about all that when I finally decided to get my thing together.

I admit my motivations were more selfish originally. I knew a lot of rather disgusting and slimy types wanted me out of the picture, this seemed to include nearly all of the maladjusted losers in the Bay Area. I didn’t know many of these people, never even met them before in fact. I didn’t even know anybody they knew, but, retards that they are they saw me presented negatively on the idiot box and, based on that alone, decided that I needed to die. Well, fuck those fools. I don’t oblige morons so I decided to clean up my act. I had decided to stop doing a lot of the stuff I was doing once I made this discovery, but something about having someone in my life who actually seemed genuinely concerned about me, someone who seemed to worry about me even when I wasn’t there was the final detail I needed to solidify my determination to make it all happen and basically become a better person.

If I’m honest with myself I have to admit that I have reason to suspect that everybody I know is involved in this conspiracy against me, even if it is in only a marginal way, but Karen did help save my life. At the very least she did help me to get more firmly in charge of my own behavior. Her just being there gave my life the very meaning those media assholes had been trying to withhold from me since I started high school, so if I live long enough to get my reward I feel it’s only right that I use part of it to help her. Of course there are many people who don’t want me to ever get my hands on that reward and these people feel compelled to make trouble for me at any and every opportunity hoping against hope that they can give me a push or a shove in the wrong direction and be instrumental in getting me to finally crash and burn. ‘Crash, burn and blow’ up ideally.

Someone may be trying to have my account here shut down. For the future, in case anything like that should ever actually happen here’s some of the other places I post these journal entries if you care to keep up on them:

I post these entries in several places online so that I know I can always speak directly to the public about these media jerks and everything they are doing to me.
At first I thought they were just trying to shut me down so they could regain their monopoly over the story of my life, but I’m pretty sure they link back to this journal on their website so that wouldn’t make a hell of a lot of sense. Of course it could just be some true believer who thinks everything they see on television is completely true and has made it their mission to shut me down because they think I’m evil or some bullshit.

Actually I think it’s most likely Dana K. Brownfield and her media cohorts could very well be behind this, but their shutting down my DA account would just be a means to an end, assuming that’s even any part of their plan in the first place. At first it crossed my mind that one of my posts may have pissed them off and they didn’t want the public to read it. I was specifically thinking of the “Cease and Desist” post when this idea occurred to me. Then I remembered that lately Dana been making it obvious to me that she is in my computer (via either some back door that was built into it or through a keylogger program) so if she didn’t want the public reading a specific post of mine she could just go ahead and delete it herself. Considering all this I’m fairly certain that this newest harassment is simply meant as another one of their distractions.

I’ve long noticed that one of their favorite tactics is to try and overwhelm me with a bunch of irrelevant annoyances whenever I have to deal with anything genuinely important to my well being. I think there’s a term for this: “taking out a mortgage” on someone. One guy holds you down while a bunch of other guys pummel you black and blue- only figuratively in my case, but they have done this to me a few times before so I know it’s definitely their preferred method of operation.

Whenever I have to focus on a serious problem I find myself suddenly vexed by an onslaught of other troubles from all directions of varying degrees of urgency. These serious problems requiring my undivided attention that I’ll need to deal with are usually problems they themselves have created for me. They always hit me hard and fast with all these distractions while I’m faced with these difficulties to try and make me fail at whatever it is that I need to do to overcome them. I do realize that’s how life is a lot of times, but in many of these cases it’s just uncanny how orchestrated and choreographed these assaults obviously are. As I’ve told you several times before, they prefer to work secretly behind the scenes because they want all my life’s setbacks as well as any mistakes I make when trying to deal with them to appear as though they are all entirely my own fault, which is kind of ridiculous when you consider that for decades now they have been making a defamatory television show about me for a living. Common sense should tell anyone that I already have a world of extra problems just by being the focus of a shitty show like that alone. I already know they’ve been kicking up their on air defamation of me during the past week or two judging by how hostile people have been behaving towards me lately. If you recall I told you they do that every time I have to face unusual challenges. They obviously do that to make these challenges seem much more imposing than they otherwise would. Everything seems much more intimidating when we find ourselves immersed in negativity.

This making trouble with my DA account is only one of several problems that they are making for me right now. They appear to have a lot of influence and also have some pretty surprising connections, so I’m sure many of you would think I was delusional if I told you some of the other things they are doing to make my life difficult for me now. That’s okay though, I have my priorities straight and I know what I need to focus on. Nothing will cause me to deviate from the path I have before me. I know how obsessed they are with destroying me, but I simply will not allow that to happen. I realize it may seem that I am jumping to conclusions by assuming all the bad things that are happening have been orchestrated by one small group of people, but, like I said before, the timing is much too suspicious so I can’t easily write any of this off as only a strange coincidence.
Anyway, write down or bookmark the above mentioned blogs because I may temporarily deactivate this account soon just so I don’t have to worry about it during this crucial period in my life. In fact I may even start a blog with my own name as a title so that anyone can find it during Google searches.

Anyway, I know why they want to distract me so I will not allow myself to be distracted. If I get through this thing okay I won’t even give a f*ck about this account anymore anyway because I’ll finally have genuinely interesting things to write about and I can take art lessons from the best so I could finally do some genuinely impressive work. That is assuming I still even want to do anything like that at all once I have the money to actually live well.

One of the things they are doing is going crazy reporting old deviations and getting them pulled. Actually the reasons given for the deletions of the deviations are pretty nit picky, and some don’t make any sense or just aren’t explained at all like in the example below. Based on how ridiculous of some of the reasons given are I suspect this may be an inside job, which doesn’t mean SF Commons has nothing to do with it. They have a lot of connections and are very good at pulling strings. Seriously though, come on, if DA has issues with an example of my work that is so strong they feel they need to pull it down from a gallery that I pay for I assume it must violate some very specific rule. Just saying that it’s “unacceptable” or that it has “unacceptable” details in it really doesn’t communicate anything. Especially since once they delete it you can’t go look at it for yourself to try and figure out exactly what the fuck they are talking about. This is only one example. Anyway I may just stay away from this account for a while and just come back when all this is over and just hope it’s still here when I get back because I simply don’t have the time to deal with any of this now. The only reason I’m writing this post is because presently its too damned hot to work.

I’d like to contact DA about this since I’m obviously the victim of yet another conspiracy here, but all I can find both here and on google are links to endless lists of FAQ with no way to directly contact anyone that I can see.

In the past couple of days five or six deviations have been pulled down. I’ve been here at least eight years so I have thousands of deviations up and I really don’t have time to comb through my whole account deleting anything that could possibly be reported and pulled by overzealous saboteurs. I certainly don’t have time to do that and do all the stuff I have to take care of in the coming couple of months to ensure my continued survival.

Of course I could be over reacting. These people have been pushing my buttons literally all my life so they are experts on how to agitate me. They probably aren’t trying to shut me down at all since links to sites like this one are one of the main attractions of their website. They’re probably just trying to get me worked up. Well, if you are reading this DKB and SF Commons, pat yourselves on the back assholes, mission accomplished. Anyway whatever happens to this site is totally meaningless when compared to my successfully getting through my present trial and winning this thing. I have to win this thing otherwise the lifetime I’ve spent suffering at your twisted hands will have been for nothing. Truth be told your trying to hurt me by doing petty shit like this only strengthens my determination to finally defeat you once and for all if anything.

Oh well, since this is likely being done to either drive me crazy or prevent me from taking care of business maybe the best thing I can do for now is just ignore all this bullshit and keep my eyes on whats at stake.
Considering what I have to gain it’s no wonder jealous people can’t stop fucking with me.

Existential Spiral:

Its a Nice Day by Mister-Seen
I think a big part of the reason they have been trying to wear me down so I’d take an early exit has to do with how they want to present this show to the world. I’m sure these worthless hacks like to think of it as an original venture, the first of its kind. Whether they consider it the world’s first reality show or the longest documentary of someone’s life ever made I can prove it has never been either. I want to be here to let everybody know that this was never a “reality show” worthy of the name and it certainly wasn’t a “documentary”. Not a true to life documentary at least. Not at all. Or, rather, if it is a “documentary” its only a documentary about their ruining my life, or them making sure I’d never have much of one to begin with. This thing has always been as contrived as any television sit com, soap opera, or any other staged production. Anyone who knows anything about modern media knows how fastidious they are about every detail of what they show. They are experts at using images and language to influence people’s thoughts and actions, and since everything shown on TV is mind control they want everything “just so”. They are absolute control freaks and they have been manipulating both me and my life constantly ever since they started this thing decades ago. I can’t wait for this nightmare to finally end so I will at last be free from these evil puppet masters and what they have been doing to me all my life. These assholes have been holding me down and trying to drive me crazy for the past 44-49 years. You have no idea what it’s like having your life constantly interfered with by these sociopaths. They are fucking sick in the head. They may have even been using black magick on me all this time, though I’m not sure I believe in that stuff, but they are Satanists and that’s what those people do. If there’s anything to all that it would explain a lot of the strange things that have been happening to me. Of course I mean all the strange things on top of what they have been obviously doing to me with their show and all the behind the scenes bullshit they have been pulling on me.

I recently came across an old journal from 2001 and reading it totally depressed me. It reminded me of how all my life nothing has ever worked out mostly due not only to my seemingly inexplicable bad luck, but to everybody always acting weird around me and toward me. I had very little control over how people perceived me so naturally that made it very difficult for me to get along with anyone. I always knew something very strange was going on but I never knew exactly what. Of course I suspected I was the center of some bizarre kind of attention but who automatically jumps to the conclusion that all their problems extend from having been exploited by a fucking secret TV show all their life? Of course all dark deeds require the strictest secrecy and this is why they have always insisted everybody lie to me about it. Anyway it’s obviously an extremely fucked up situation and it’s a wonder I’ve not snapped and gone on a homicidal spree years ago.

Believe me, I really hate complaining all the time like this, but I really feel trapped. I’ve felt claustrophobic, trapped and closed in nearly my entire life and could never get away from it. I’ve felt this way almost as far back as I can remember. Wherever I moved this nightmare has followed me around. It has been impossible to get away from or hide from it. I think by now I’ve made my feelings about all this obvious.

I think they figured that because both my parents were drug addicts that it would be easy for them to use drugs to ultimately get rid of me while it was convenient. Fortunately it turned out I’m made of much sterner stuff than they assumed and I was able to walk away from all that as soon as I figured out what they were up to. I’m very fortunate that that was the case.

It’s been hell, but despite the fact that I’ve been complaining about what this thing has been doing to me, even for years before I was even sure what has been going on, they’ve consistently ignored my pleas for mercy and refuse to let up. Instead they laugh at me, and whats even worse these sadistic bastards even intensify it. There can be no doubt they have been using this thing to try and kill me because they always greatly escalate their slander campaign against me whenever I get into any kind of trouble, and usually they themselves are the ones who caused that trouble in the first place.

I make these posts so there can be no question as to how I feel about all this, or how I’ve always felt about all this. I even sent out more cease and desist notices lately. This isn’t the first time I’ve done this. I sent them out about ten years ago too. Below is what I sent out. The ones I sent out last time were very similar. I know they got them the last time I sent them out. Not only do I have the receipts from the ones I sent certified mail I also emailed copies to them too, and they responded to them, so there is no doubt they got them. Below is what I recently sent:
MjgzNTU2Mw by Mister-Seen
(names and addresses have been omitted)
To Whom it may concern:
You are hereby directed to cease and desist all defamation and slander of Ronald F, Tweedie’s character and reputation.

Ronald F. Tweedie knows you have been engaging in spreading incendiary and defamatory stories and rumors about him.
It is not only illegal to abuse the airwaves to slander someone, it is also illegal to make and broadcast audiotapes of someone recorded without their knowledge and permission in the State of California and to secretly videotape someone in their own home and then broadcast that video over the airwaves without their knowledge or permission.
It is also a criminal act to hide cameras and microphones in their private residence for the purpose of recording and spying on them.
Stop manufacturing, broadcasting and distributing all such illegally made videos and recordings IMMEDIATELY!
Also you do NOT have Ronald F. Tweedie’s permission to use ANY of his art, photographs or writings on any of your videos or broadcasts.
You have been warned and the community knows you have been warned.
Cease also using any of the above illegally made or stolen materials over the internet as well. Also immediately take down any pictures of Ronald F. Tweedie and his home and any copies of his private emails you have posted on your website.
This harassment must STOP! Your slander and libel has cost Ronald F. Tweedie his livelihood and has grown so bad he is uncomfortable leaving his house. You are out of control and I demand you stop this harassment NOW!
This letter serves as a notice to you to immediately cease and desist all harassing activities against Ronald F. Tweedie, including, but not limited to your television show and website that exploits him.
Your actions are unwanted and have become unbearable to him. Your actions infringe upon his right to remain free of harassment. As a result of your harassment he has suffered immeasurably.
Ronald F. Tweedie
30624121 10211524580652042 7728796600769618329 N by Mister-Seen
They will probably make themselves scarce and not sign for them this time. Dana is in my computer again so she likely knows I made them. Don’t ask me how she got in here but as usual she has no self control and like a bratty child she lets me know she’s there. That’s okay. I’m sure that if I do hear back from them they’ll just lie to me like last time. Fine. Everybody reads this journal and everybody knows they read it too so everyone knows how I feel about all this and that its not okay. Not okay at all.

Although I sometimes worry that they don’t ever intend to compensate me for the nearly fifty fucking years of hell they put me through it seems I’m pretty famous so a lot of people know about this thing, which seems to make it much less likely they plan on totally screwing me. I have noticed that, although they don’t seem to spare any expense on surveillance equipment, spies and whores they have yet to directly give so much as a cent to me, their star, the source of all the money they’re making. It’s bad enough I’ve never been paid, but they even get you guys to pay for my room and board. If this isn’t proof that the entertainment industry controls the government and not the other way around I don’t know what is.

Although I’d really like nothing better than to teach these evil people a lesson after everything they’ve put me through I feel just the fact that I’ve survived it all relatively unscathed is pretty good revenge by itself considering how badly they wanted to put an end to me. Nobody has any idea what I’ve been through. Everybody from coworkers, employers, teachers, cops, hell, you name it, random people from all over the place, has been dumping on me constantly over the years because of that psychotic show of theirs. My entire life, starting from when I was very young, has been fucked up and wasted by a show they had no right to make and no one has any right to watch. They never told me what they were doing and they never paid me a fucking cent and the whole time they have been intentionally working to make my life as depressing as possible. Yeah, I can’t wait till this is finally over but it should have ended a long time ago. In fact it never should have been done at all.

There’s a lot more going on here than just my having been relentlessly harassed for nearly half a century by a bunch of rich assholes. There’s also many important legal and philosophical questions at stake, constitutionality, my right to privacy and my freedom to think what I want and what I have the right to say in the privacy of my own home. I refuse to say the same stupid, ignorant shit everybody is expected to just to please the people who are invading my privacy. I have a right say anything I want in private and certainly no one has a right to eavesdrop and especially to record and broadcast it. Anyway by now I’m only speaking to the densest among you as I’d have thought that much should be obvious.

That’s all I wanted to say today. Just wanted there to be absolutely no mistake how I feel about all this, assuming there ever was any ambiguity on that subject.

Bow down to the maggots:

B11cf36c9f6dd4ff9cd8df39adec0e007b7a919ee0b837eac5 by Mister-Seen

Bow down for the maggots,

the maggots, the maggots,
Bow down to the maggots,
the maggots, the maggots,
This guy lives in an interesting set up-
A big place that opens up to a big patio area
consisting of a wooded frame with a tarpaulin stretched over it.
The place is real messy- all kinds of containers with the lids off all over the place.
Anyway, this guy is on vacation in some 3rd world Middle Eastern country
and he sees this guy in a prison cell (I think) screaming and acting insane
and he notices something crawling around under the skin of his head.
Later, back in the States, he gets an idea for a film project- no, I think that’s later.
First he starts renting those cheesy, low budget porno flicks
(actually this may have happened before the trip)
that are popular with the younger people. There’s a bunch of them in the series,
all starring an enchanting young lady whose name I can’t remember.
There’s a big line at the video store to rent them.
Anyway, this guy is really into them, and the guy always has a lot of friends,
both male and female, hanging out at his place.
Outer Limits - The Mutant (19) by Mister-Seen
Anyway, one of his friends offers to introduce him to the star of these films.
The guy says, “Okay”, so he meets her. And they talk. He tells her how much he likes her films.
Initially there’s a gay couple there and one mentions how much he likes her perfect ass and his boyfriend gets jealous.
They leave. I forget if there’s some ceremony or if she just puts some sort of spell on him,
but the guy is changed into some muscular, long blond haired, blue eyed, huge, thick cocked version of himself.
They fuck- she acts bored the entire time- then she leaves. Then we notice that under his skin is teaming with writhing maggots.
It gets confusing at this point because we don’t know if whats happening is real or just him making his movie-
but now he has these powers. He can turn invisible. He does and he goes across the street to this place
where a bunch of young ladies are hanging out to rape and kill them, you know, strangle, stab and cut off their heads.
Then, I think, while returning to his place he accidentally messes up the tarpaulin and the street is flooded with water.
Later, when he and his friends go out and fix it, they can’t find some of the support pegs-
so he gets a flashlight and finds them, washed by the current, under the main frame-
or was it the car? So they fix it.

Fatigue and Conflict:

Punch by Mister-Seen
“The only successful suicide is a failed suicide”
– Christian Bobin

I can not believe they have been getting away with doing this to me all these years. It’s blatantly illegal, unconstitutional in fact, not that any of the nut bags around here give so much as a flying fuck about anybody’s rights. And how is what they are doing any kind of responsible use of media anyway? What is the point misusing the airwaves to pick on some lone guy, especially after they’ve already cost him his livelihood and all his friends? What are they hoping to prove by constantly setting him up and messing him up like they do? I know they’ve also been working hard to make him into the sort of character who they want people to think “deserves it”, but does that really make any of this right? If we stop respecting people’s rights as a matter of course then we are truly sliding down a most treacherous slippery slope. Any mature, thinking and reasonable person can see how childish this whole thing is, as well as what an unbridled nightmare its been for me, and I find it interesting that no one seems concerned with how ill it bodes for our collective future that something like this has been allowed to go on. I’m sure these criminal programmers would likely respond to this with something like, “Hey, we never said this show was a public service message or anything like that, it’s just entertainment, something to amuse people, so please don’t try and read too much into it, okay?”. Well, then I’d ask them what is so entertaining about using spy technology and the media (internet, television and possibly DVDs) to bully one single, defenseless, introverted loner all his life anyway? Since when is it accepted as ‘entertainment’ to try and drive a person to self destruction? What kind of example are you setting? You people claim to be against “bullying”, yet you’ve been unloading on me longer than most people would even be willing to believe. The modern media machine is a most imposing and intimidating adversary, especially when used against an individual without the connections or financial resources to defend himself. Do you seriously mean for us to believe you can’t possibly find a more productive use for not only the internet, but television as well? These people are supposedly educated so they really should know better than to be behaving like a bunch of demented children with too much power. These sociopaths clearly don’t understand ethics or know how to act responsibly. These are not the kind of people who should even be allowed to work in the media.

I really shouldn’t need to remind you all how poorly this reflects on your community too. That should be obvious without my even having to go into how inappropriately many of you behave because of this crude propaganda, or all the bizarre, behind the scenes stuff that has been going on. Your allowing all this shows that you have no real idea what human rights are so it could be argued you don’t deserve them yourself.

It’s no wonder they never asked my permission to use me on their fucked up show. I’d never have given it. Believe me, I don’t like living like this. I hate even leaving the house anymore, and I’m always apprehensive about the future. All you people who think I’m just ‘doing it wrong’, or that it’s just my own ‘bad attitude’ that’s holding me down are full of shit and don’t know what the fuck you’re even talking about. Unless you’re actually suggesting that I surrender all my individuality and just go along with the crowd and think and act the same as the lowest common denominator, because that’s the only way I’d be able to avoid the ill will of the cathode ray hypnotized public. Even then I know from what I’ve heard on this show that they’d lie and imply scandalous things about me just to keep the public’s interest up because, lets face it, if I never got caught up in any kind of controversy the public would lose interest in their show pretty fast. It’s the very nature of this business, at least these days. Today’s public doesn’t enjoy watching some bland, ‘normal’, even tempered guy just staying out of trouble and leading a contented life. The 1950’s are over people. No, they want to see fiery car crashes, suffering and mayhem, this is why it’s as immoral as hell to go around making unsuspecting people into walking TV shows.

I apologize for shifting gears here, but I just want to take a break and share a very strange dream I had last night. The whole thing was rather unusual, and, though of course I can’t remember most of it I found one of the parts I can vaguely remember somewhat disturbing. I was with an attractive young lady and there was a lot of “heavy petting” going on, but the groping and dry humping somehow morphed into my being vigorously “rubbed” all over. It was dark and I got the impression I was trying to anoint myself all over with some kind of liniment, only I wasn’t really doing it, someone else was, someone of gigantic proportions. They were rubbing something all over me and were being careful not to miss anyplace so they were doing it in sections. The whole dream was very weird. A few nights previous, or maybe it was just the night before, I kept having this abstract dream where I’m working my way down a calendar, or kind of like moving a game piece down a game board, only it was vertical, but something kept coming down to block me on the last square. I was kept from completing the sequence all the way to the end. Normally I’d just consider these types of dreams incomplete or useless bits of nocturnal nonsense, but in light of all that’s been going on and my recent revelations I can’t help but feel there’s something sinister implied here.
Kontroll02 by Mister-Seen
Other than that everything is relatively fine and peaceful right now, but I can’t help feeling there may be, as usual, trouble brewing underneath of it all. I think it has to do with the symbolism involved because I’ve noticed that they always try to uproot me and cast me out whenever their’s renovations to be done wherever I’m staying. That was Dana’s official explanation, “renovations”, the one she gave me and the social workers at least, that time she kicked me out when I couldn’t find anywhere else to go back in 2007, they attempted it again in 2012 when they were getting ready to refurbish the welfare hotel in Oakland. Fortunately it didn’t work that time because they didn’t have a real reason for evicting me and I know my rights. The same excuse for displacing or trying to displace me had been used at least two other times that I can now recall. This is a constantly reoccurring theme so the coming renovations of my present home are bound to be a very dangerous time for me. I need to stay alert and focus on what’s important. They already tried to kick me out once due to Karen’s accumulating a huge mound of trash bags in our patio. Fortunately she appreciated the magnitude of the situation she had created and actually got rid of them in a timely fashion. I was very impressed that she had the inner resolve to do what needed to be done in that emergency. Her OCD causes her to attach an abnormal amount of importance to clutter other people would just throw out as a matter of course. It’s always nice when people can surprise you in a positive way, the opposite is all too often the case.

Despite my feeling overall tired and sick a certain amount of positive animal spirits are managing to bubble up to the surface so I’m feeling mostly optimistic right now. I’m thinking I must be due a substantial payday for all this because otherwise why have they been trying to get me to kill myself all these years? They’ve been turning the world against me since I was a child, made my life miserable and have even gone through a lot of trouble, on several occasions, to not only get me into controversy and trouble of various kinds, but to get me involved in dangerous drugs, and this campaign of theirs has intensified to a near fever pitch during the past twenty years. They clearly want to truncate my existence. Despite making tons of money off me they feel threatened by my staying alive too long. I take this to mean that they are afraid of having to deal with their former victim in the future when he may no longer be so defenseless. It’s much more than their being just too cheap and not wanting to pay me. I know that if I were gone they would just have to give any money they might owe me to someone else but I think whoever got it would just be happy to have it and wouldn’t bother going after them for all the slimy, underhanded things they’ve been doing to me behind the scenes all these years, or even potentially embarrass them by mentioning any of it to the press, assuming they’d even know anything about it. I’m not sure whether my optimism is helping me see things more clearly or whether it is just making me more delusional, but that’s what I’m thinking right now.

They must be making good money off this show because they keep this thing going despite the fact I am now getting older and therefore am fast becoming relatively boring to most of the demographic they are trying to appeal too. I think it would be beyond the craft and trickery of even these shysters to make me as entertaining, or even as interesting to spy on as I may have been when I was young, fresh and spry. Despite this they keep this thing rolling along even though they can’t have possibly captured any intriguing footage for it for years now. I can only imagine they must keep rehashing the same old stories and segments over and over again. Since I have robbed them of their grand finale this show is bound to run out of steam and die a natural death soon enough and I am very grateful that I will outlive it despite the fact they have been working very hard trying to ensure it would outlive me.

If I am fairly compensated for all the pain and suffering they’ve caused me I want to use that money to help pass more legislation protecting the privacy of individuals. I like how the government pretends they have to invade people’s privacy to protect us from terrorism yet at the same time they are constantly doing things that create that very concern. What a set up. Of course I’m not just talking about the government as I personally have been victimized by a group of private citizens who just have more money than respect for human dignity. Clearly we need to do more to discourage this sort of thing, make the consequences too serious for them even to consider doing anything like this again in the future.

o-ANTI-GAY-BULLYING-facebook by Mister-Seen
Being clever enough to figure out what people are doing to you isn’t a blessing, however, if you find you are powerless to stop it. Being aware of how you are being murdered certainly doesn’t make the experience any less unpleasant. I know they’ll try magic, psychology. the media, their money, whatever they have I can expect them to throw it at me. The only things I have in my favor is that they have to be subtle, and they prefer that anything bad that happens to me appears to be completely my own fault, and, of course, the fact that I know what they’re up to can give me strategic advantages if I know how to act on that knowledge. It can also be an enormous help if I can effectively communicate it to the public because they prefer sneaking around and working in secrecy so they don’t like people knowing what they are up to. I was dwelling in ignorance of what they were doing to me for years and they exercised almost complete control over me so naturally my life was very disappointing and difficult. Even though I now know what I know it still is, but I’m very thankful I figured the game out before the end so I have a chance of coming out of this alright.

I may add a little bit to this post later but I have something different in store for my next post, some new information and how it fits in with the big picture so I’ll see you all again in a few days.

The Protocols of the Elders of Zanuck: Psychological Warfare and Filth at the Movies:


I’ve known a lot of people who talk about writing a book, hell, I myself have been threatening to write a book for years now, and I’ve even known one or two who claim they are in the process of actually writing a book. So far none of these promised books have materialized, but this crazy bastard has really gone and done it! He’s not only written a book and even published it, but it’s a 649 page behemoth: “The Protocols of the Elders of Zanuck: Psychological Warfare and Filth at the Movies”

As he starts his book by saying in his personal statement, this book isn’t about Zanuch or the hotly debated Protocols of Zion, not exclusively at any rate, it’s actually about nothing less than the Hollywood film industry itself from it’s inception to the present day and how it has, little by little, subverted the popular mind to its present confused state. This book is great, and not only because he quotes me extensively (LOL!), but because it’s full of fascinating insights and not widely known information not only about films, but the poeple who make them.

Although cinema is the youngest of the plastic arts it has, in both my opinion and that of the author, Rainer Chlodwig von K., had the most impact on Western culture in recent history. In fact, during the past 120 years it has transformed our culture beyond all recognition, and it’s degenerative influence has accelerated considerably since 1948 with the advent of television. The imaginary world these mediums show us has encouraged us for generations to let our guards down and be more ‘tolerant’ and accept all kinds of practices, organizations and policies that are not only incompatible with the world we had been working towards for hundreds of years, many of them have proven to be most harmful and corrosive to basic human nature and the high standard of living we once enjoyed. Of course all media, movies, television, radio, popular music, newspapers, magazines, book publishing, social media, video games (and this list is still growing as new technologies are perfected like virtual reality) work together to encase us in a matrix of subversive and destructive norms. In fact the author and I were recently discussing how weird and out of it most young people act these days. I remember my grandparents saying this same thing about my generation, and I have no doubt we were a lot more frivolous, irresponsible and selfish than young people were in the 1930’s. People born at the beginning of the last century have absolutely nothing, or, at least very little, in common with those born at the beginning of this one. The author and I believe the media is largely responsible for this, and many more people are waking up to this same conclusion every day. The “generation gap” had never before been much of an issue until the 1960’s when the media invented “youth culture” and started relentlessly promoting it. Then it suddenly became a very big issue and it hasn’t gone away since. In fact its since gotten so bad that it’s been commonly accepted as a given fact that kids and their parents can never be on the same wavelength.

Culture stayed pretty much the same for hundreds of years with only occasional superficial transformations from time to time due to economic and technological changes. The way people lived may have occasionally changed, and drastically, but social mores and values stayed basically the same.  Since the coming of the modern media (and film has been a major aspect of that) people’s attitudes and thinking started altering significantly, and it started to really accelerate in the early 60’s to where slang and popular thinking was being altered every few years, although this has slowed down considerably during the past 20 or 25 years. This is very likely because we’re finally approaching the final stages of their social engineering.

He comes on strong in his first chapter, “Alien Overlords of a Zombie Wasteland” where he jumps right into it discussing Hollywood’s never ending obsession with portraying dystopic future worlds and alternate realities of both physical and spiritual emptiness. He starts off with a disturbing observation about the movie, “Soylent Green” where “Sol Roth”, who is played by Edward G. Robinson, decides to have himself voluntarily euthanized in a government run center where they show you pleasant scenes set to peaceful music in a sort of cinema as they slowly drain the life out of you, and poignantly points out how this can easily be construed as an analogy for Western civilization allowing itself to whither away to nothing in front of a movie screen. Hollywood is full of symbolism like this. The occult and black magic are also full of symbolism and I see a very dark connection there. Don’t worry though, Rainer isn’t as esoteric as I am so you won’t be subjected to anything mystical like that, at least not if you don’t have any doubts that the media is just a gigantic machine used to alter the mass consciousness.

I remember when I was in junior high school that there was something of a debate about whether TV and movies copied life or whether or whether life copied television and film. It seemed to be a very good question to not only my 13 year old mind but the rest of the nation at the time. Of course there was never any real question about it, this whole “debate” was contrived, like the debate about whether television and movie violence affected the behavior of those who viewed it. There have been numerous studies that prove beyond a doubt that exposure to violence in the media inspires people to try and solve their own problems using violence, so of course media has a very profound effect on society, and children and people of low intelligence will be quickly influenced by what they watch, and through repeated exposure everyone else is eventually softened up enough to accept what they are shown in the media as “normal”. They will accept not only violence, but all the behavior they see staged before them in general. The people working in movies and television won’t admit this, not publicly at least, so they keep the debate alive in the media. Their most famous attempt at obfuscation was the “release valve” argument, where they claimed watching violence and pornography actually relieved building tensions in viewers making it much less likely that they will feel the need to actually indulge in such behavior, but ask any homicide detective and he’ll tell you how common it is for violent offenders to consciously replicate some gruesome murder they saw in a movie, or how many serial killers and rapists are heavily into pornography.
Don’t listen to the media’s hype, movies, television and even music have an undeniable affect on human behavior and they obviously know this, which is why they intentionally crank out all the degenerate crap they do. They will tell you they only do it because there’s a market for it, but considering a taste for such trash hardly even existed a generation or two before it’s obvious that they themselves have created this market that they claim they have to satisfy.


It used to be that people were very concerned about the influence media has on people. Anyone who knows about the events that lead to the introduction of the “Comics Code Authority” knows how serious people were about keeping unseemly material away from children and the simple minded. Fast forward to today and most parents either don’t care about such matters anymore or they are just so overwhelmed by the cesspool of filth and corruption we have come to live in that they feel helpless and wouldn’t even know where to begin to try and change things.

Just a small example, prior to the 1960’s people always dressed nice before going out in public and nobody would dream of using foul or even strong language at work or in front of women and children, but nowadays it seems to be perfectly normal to talk like ghetto trash in nearly any social situation. I don’t think it’s a coincidence that bad language started becoming common in movies in the mid to late sixties. Now it seems very common in movies to drop at least one or two “F bombs”. If I seriously looked into it I’ve no doubt I’d be able to trace the origins of today’s lax dress code to television and cinema too. The promiscuity young people started practicing in the 70’s is legendary today since it contrasted so starkly with the self control they had maintained till then. Is it only a coincidence that nearly every movie that came out at that time had at least one obligatory nude scene in it? Anyway Rainer does an excellent job of demonstrating how cinema has, time and again, foreshadowed things like “the Civil Rights Act” and the “Open Immigration Act” as well as every major war we have become embroiled in since “the War to End All Wars”.

He ends the book, appropriately, on the topic of censorship. Clearly we need some form of censorship to try and counter this “anything goes” swamp of prurient pandering we see everywhere these days. I used to be one of those “weird, cutting edge, over the top” gallery artists back in the day so I’m familiar with both sides of this debate. As the book points out a lot of the official arguments put forward against censorship, by the television and motion picture industries, of course, are suspiciously self serving and, frankly, ridiculous. Ironically enough they use the ‘slippery slope” approach to ridicule the idea of censorship, as if censoring gay BDSM porn will eventually lead to censorship of even the most benign forms of entertainment. This is very funny because we should know for a fact by now that the complete lack of censorship or the application of any kind of community standards is precisely what has led us to not only things like furry porn, Lolis, and all the other sick and weird stuff out there, but today’s chaotic, materialistic world where everything is “relative” and many people have not so much as a vestigial moral compass to guide their behavior any longer, but that’s okay as long as they have the media there to tell them what to do and think about everything.

Evening Sunrise:

Creepy Dwarf by Mister-Seen

“Forget the Past and you’ll lose both eyes”

-old Russian proverb

Damn! I thought of a really clever and appropriate title for this post earlier but I’ve since completely forgotten what it was! I guess I’m stuck with the stupid working title “Evening Sunrise” if I can’t remember it or think of another one. I’m such a horrible writer that simply the fact anyone reads my posts at all pretty much proves my already existing popularity beyond all doubt. I don’t even know who most of these people are so you don’t need to be Sherlock Holmes to know something funny is going on. Sometimes my writing is okay but I think a lot of these posts are downright embarrassing. I’m primarily a visual artist anyway. That’s okay, after I get a few things out of the way I’m going to start drawing again. I won’t give out anymore information on that now because I don’t want my efforts cursed. You know, I’m starting to believe that my very reluctance to put pencil to paper could very well be a result of some of their infernal incantations. If so I may be making art sooner than you think since I’ve already experienced surprising success melting a lot of their devil magick spells away lately. I noticed they’ve been changing the focus of this show away from my work to mostly attacks and criticism against me personally since the mid 90’s. Actually, who am I kidding? They’ve always badmouthed me, it’s just gotten more savage and vicious lately. And on fucking TV of all things. Talk about a grotesquely unfair advantage, and I’m not even allowed to hear what they say. They obviously do this to stir people up against me. I wish I knew why I’m so fucking important. I must be considering all the trouble they go through and how many people they employ working on that damned thing. Actually I think they made me important only so they could tear me down in front of the public. Magick is mostly symbolism anyway people. I may make a post on that later.

You know, the Bay Area is not only a hotbed of drugs and sexual perversion, there is also a lot of occult activity here. They portray me in such a way it’s guaranteed to majorly upset all the local wildlife so you just know all those witches and church of Satan people have been hexing the living shit out of me for years now. This all is intentional and I believe it’s the reason they had their agents “educate” me as they did (some of you may recall my “scapegoat” theory). I think that until recently they’ve been very successful at messing me up with their supernatural campaign, but to be honest their televisual and internet defamation seems to have done a lot more damage to me than their diabolic harassment, especially since I figured out what they were doing. The “spells”, or whatever you want to call them, were very effective at controlling my behavior and the media has been ruthlessly making real world problems for me as far back as I can remember. Like I keep saying, this is why they are so secretive and sneaky, your ignorance gives them incredible power over you. Once you figure out what they’re up to they lose a lot of their control, so wake up and free yourselves everybody!

Around three or four days ago it was pretty darn chilly, but it has been warming up considerably lately. This morning it cooled down a bit but not too much so I suppose winter is finally over around here, at least what passes for winter around here finally is. I’m making impressive progress on the prep work for the coming renovations I’m very happy to say. So far everything is coming along fine! Of course by now all the easier stuff is out of the way and only the more difficult things are left to deal with, but I’m making such impressive progress I’ve no doubt it will end in resounding success!

Aside from that one, specific project the past couple of days in particular have been depressingly wasteful and I honestly have no idea where all that time has gone, but I feel that I’m finally getting a grip and have the upper hand over that ADD. (I’ve been wondering lately whether my ADD may not also be the result of  their hocus pocus mumbo jumbo). Someday I’d like to find out all of what they have been saying and doing my unsuspecting back all these years. Another very bad thing about this idiotic charade those media dorks are putting on is that I can’t get help with my ADD because everyone is pretending I’m delusional because I know about their TV show, and it’s just not a good idea to give anyone medication that helps them focus if they are crazy. Just another example of how their evil deeds snowball. I have a lot of legitimate grievances with this show and the fuckwits who make it, but, of course nobody’s supposed to care about their abysmal disregard for ethics and morality but is rather encouraged to carry on criticizing every little thing I do and trying to tear me into smaller and smaller pieces even though I’ve completely retired from public life years ago, and never even had any power or influence in the first place. Seriously, why though? Why have I never been allowed to be left alone by these monsters? And it’s been going on nearly my entire life, since elementary school. If I had committed some heinous crime I’d likely have been released after a few years and had a team of social workers helping me put together a good life for myself. What gives these arrogant pieces of shit the right to punish me year after year after year like this? And for what?! I don’t know how they excuse their motivation for all this to the public, but it seriously feels like they are punishing me. It’s been going on forever, getting progressively more negative and invasive. I feel that they intend to keep going with it till they finally succeed in squeezing the last bit of joy out of my life, then go on to squeeze all of life itself out of me.

For the longest time I simply could not figure out why I had such rotten luck. I remember I used to tell people that I felt like God was always fucking with me. Then I found out it was TV that was fucking with me, and since so many people think television is God it all finally made a warped sort of sense.
DSiUCjCVoAAGr3v by Mister-Seen
Either I’m getting in touch with the underlying structure of the universe now or reality is very subjective. I don’t mean my ‘perceptions’ of reality are subjective, I mean reality itself. I’m growing more and more convinced that I’m actually an important part of some kind of huge moral struggle that’s going on. Not sure how I feel about it though. I’m sure all you people that naively believe everything they tell you on that show have no idea what I’m talking about, but that really doesn’t matter. They put a lot of effort into trying to prove I’m the bad guy, but push all their hype aside and you’ll see I’ve not done anything inexcusably bad, even counting all the weird shit they coerced me into doing behind the scenes using either their paid agents (and possibly even the occult). They are even largely responsible for educating me in my present point of view, but since you are eager to believe anything they tell you on the idiot box I don’t expect you to grasp the implications of all that. Most people will just believe whoever can afford the most expensive presentation, and since I ain’t got the “do re mi” there’s no point on my even bothering to play this game. Tapping away in this obscure corner of the internet is the best I can do. Even if I was the best writer ever I haven’t a chance against all their money and media. I just have to have faith that truth will out in the end.

It used to be one of my biggest fears that life might actually be meaningless and all that mattered was pleasure and power, but now I’m convinced of the existence of a spiritual dimension. The thought brokers behind that show also believe in the spiritual world, only, since the joy and wonder of existence has long ago left them, or ossified into a jaded cynicism, they are no longer awed by it and they still believe the world is only about pleasure and power, their own pleasure and power. Instead of developing any kind of connection with the rest of humanity and the universe from what they’ve learned about metaphysics they have been using this knowledge to control what they feel are inferior beings. “Inferior beings” like you and me and all the billions of others on this sphere. I’m now convinced that that TV show they use me for has occult significance. Although it has devastated my own life that was possibly just one of the side effects of making it, not the only reason for it. It’s real purpose was social engineering and the further beguiling of the public (the world). These people control you by worming their way into your heads, and their mind control is EVERYWHERE, in every ad you see, every song you hear, in movies, TV, on billboards, in magazines, in modern art, even architecture and fashion design, and even in modern language itself. Some people even believe they put chemicals in the air and water to control you. I wouldn’t doubt that they do. Even certain frequencies of sound affect you mood. They make extensive use of this and many other tricks in pop music as well as all their other media. They know all the tricks of how to manipulate what you feel, think, dream and do. They even know things you are incapable of even imagining because they have always been obsessed with control and learning how to most effectively exert and wield it. They have us all submerged in a poison matrix of their own making.

In the 1950’s they spent millions of dollars on “marketing research”, ostensibly to learn how to make better ads and commercials. But what are ads and commercials if not mind control? They still spend a fortune to this day learning how to better manipulate people. Google “government can project voices into your head”, “voice of God weapon” and “Zuckerberg’s mind reading software” just for starters. This combined with the increasingly oppressive political climate doesn’t bode very well for our collective future.
DTgHW1VVMAckQin by Mister-Seen
I know at least some of you people are disappointed that I no longer seem to do anything remotely interesting. Well, you know whose to blame for that. Those power mad assholes behind that damned show have no self control and got way too carried away stirring up trouble for me using fucking television to turn not only the entire community, but the fucking world against me. Only a fool or a liar would deny that’s what they have been doing. I’d like to take an art class but it will likely be full of young people. Young people generally have minimal life experience so they tend to naively believe everything they see on TV, and, well, lets just say I don’t suffer fools gladly. I also need to go into the city and get some important dental work done but the show originates from there and it seems that they all mindlessly follow it, so, understandably I’m not too eager to go out into that environment. It got so bad that a life of minimal excitement in my own home has become vastly preferable to the life of negative chaos they were making for me outside. Since I had that choice I naturally picked the option that was most conducive to my own personal safety and sanity. I haven’t a chance of competing with the mass media so I see no point in even trying. Besides, these people are poor matchmakers and I really don’t care for the kind of company they tend to get me involved with. Just consider me on strike if that helps you to understand what I’m saying.

I know these people, audience included, criticize me unjustly. At least they were doing so back when I was listening to this thing. They obviously don’t give a fuck about my legal rights so naturally they could care less about saying unfair things about me. All these TV people are doing is working up an unruly mob against me. Most people these days are empty vessels living only to be told what to think and do. Anyway it’s really a base and low concept for a show. They ruin my life then record and broadcast it. Not much has changed since the days they threw people to wild beast in the Colosseum to amuse the public. I never agreed to any of this and it has made things difficult and disappointing for me most of my life. I’ve been pleading for them to stop for eleven years now but my wishes have not only been entirely ignored, this damned show has actually been growing progressively more cruel and invasive all this time. Everyone who reads anything I have written knows I want it stopped. Also considering the devastation they have caused me I think I also certainly deserve compensation for all I have lost.

Okay, I know I’m just flogging a dead horse at this point, even worse, it seems, the more I complain the more audacious and brazen they get. They love doing this sort of thing, playing demented gods. They live for it.
Untitled by Mister-Seen
Right now I’m reading “The Gulag Archipelago”. After that I’d like to read, “Democracy in America”. I just ordered two very interesting books I’m curious about, “The Books of Enoch”: and, “Who built the Moon?”. I believe the “Book of Enoch” talks about a lot of stuff from the time of Genesis and mentions “Nephilim”. From my understanding they are the product of the union of human females and fallen angels and they are usually giants. In burial mounds across the globe their have been found the ancient remains (at least 8,000 years old if memory serves) of giants seven to twelve feet tall, often with double rows of teeth. Judging by how they are buried and what they are buried with (slaves, artifacts made with precious stones and metals) they seem to have been kings. People used to find huge human bones all across America (Google for old newspaper articles about them) and turned them over to the Smithsonian. Oddly enough they have all since disappeared, although some still exist in private collections. They are so old many of them that they often begin to rapidly deteriorate once exposed to the modern atmosphere. Anyway it’s one of those interesting topics not recognized by mainstream science so theirs not exactly an overabundance of research available.

“Who Built the Moon” is about our familiar satellite and it’s anomalies and it proposes an original and unique theory to explain them. This is from the book description, ” They found a consistent sequence of integer numbers that they can apply to every major aspect of the Moon; no such pattern emerges for any other planet or moon in the solar system. In addition, Knight and Butler discovered that the Moon possesses few or no heavy metals and has no core—something that should not be possible. Their persuasive conclusion: if higher life only developed on Earth because the Moon is exactly what it is and where it is, it becomes unreasonable to cling to the idea that the Moon is a natural object”. Also, from what I understand, the moon orbits the earth much closer than it should, closer than any of the other moons in our solar system orbit their parent planets. It’s a very remarkable “coincidence” that the moon perfectly superimposes itself over the sun during eclipse (sun and moon are the exact same size in our sky). Also, when the Apollo 12 intentionally crashed part of its Lunar Module into the Moon, it rang like a bell for an hour, indicating that it must be hollow like a bell. Some argue that it’s because the moon is just so dry. I don’t know, but the book sounds very interesting. I only hope it’s written well.
DUELezmUMAIWC03 by Mister-Seen
All my life I’ve only believed what science can prove. Science requires facts for proof but many facts are ignored, or sometimes they are ambiguous but they only use them to prove whatever hypothesis is in vogue at the time. Unusual and unexplained things occur, not often, granted, but they do from time to time. For instance I’m concerned for Karen’s future. I’m not confident she can make it on her own, that someone will eventually take advantage of her and fleece her of what little she has. I held these concerns in common with her mother. Before she died I promised her I’d do my best to look out for Karen, and that if I ever get the money I’m due that I’ll use it to protect her from harm. On the 27th of December when I was getting ready to leave the house for an early morning doctor’s appointment, around 6am I think, I heard a strange squeaking noise coming from the dining room. When I investigated it I found the ceiling fan was spinning. I never turn it on but the switch was in the on position and the fan was spinning. How did it turn itself on when I wasn’t even in the room? A week later when I finally talked to Karen she told me her mother had passed away. Later in the conversation after we had worked our way down to sharing trivia and events of minor importance I told her about the fan incident and I told her what day it happened. We then both realized that both the fan episode and her mother’s demise occurred not only on the same day, but the fan’s independent and mysterious activity happened very shortly after her mother’s last breath, freakishly soon after adjusting for the time difference between here and where they were. Of course I suspect it was her mother’s spirit checking in on me and reminding me of the promise I made her before going off to her next incarnation (or ultimate destiny depending on your religious inclination). I also realize it’s possible that this whole experience might just be another set up of those TV people who direct my life. Since my home is basically a set where a television show is staged and filmed they may have been able to turn on the fan remotely. Perhaps Karen’s mother never died at all. Maybe that wasn’t even Karen’s mother in the first place since my life is so full of actors. It’s very confusing so it’s just easier for me to play along with the script sometimes and pretend that things really are what they seem to be. If I assume everything is fake and constantly engage myself in trying to figure out every little aspect of what they could be doing I’d eventually completely lose my mind.

Sometime in the middle of June, possibly July, after all the madness over here is finally finished and because it will be an all day trip, I plan on taking a little journey out to Mariposa Street in SF. Just a little exploratory expedition to familiarize myself with the lay of the land. I’ll let you all know what happens when the time comes.

My progress in figuring out what they are doing to me and my freeing myself of it has been very slow but steady. I do wish I could catch on a little faster than I do, but I am very heartened by the fact I’ve made such solid progress. Lets be honest, a lot of people live very long lives and die before they figure out the first thing about themselves or their relationship to the world. It’s not even all about intelligence either, but imagination and the ability to change your focus. Tearing down cherished notions you may have held for years because they were built on a faulty foundation and putting something drastically different up in it’s place on a more sound substratum. It’s always a lot of work arriving at the truth. The sad part is that even the lucky few of us who do manage to figure the universe out eventually have to die only to start over from scratch again, although not completely over.